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Archive for Crap

45 Days from another Disaster?

Recently deceased Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg (L) Real-estate mogul with bad hair. (R)

The 2020 U.S. presidential election will be held on Tuesday, November 3rd. This is perhaps one of the most talked-about and contentious elections in recent history.

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COVID CRAZY: unnecessary update

Thank fuck I’m NOT an Amerikin! I am reminded of that joyous reality every time I’m forced to endure yet another farcical update from that land of redneck morons…

Stupidity and Guns; the USA in a nutshell.
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A worldwide message to Americans

It’s not that the rest of the world « hates » your current Presudent…

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INSIDE AMAZON • packaging C-19

It’s was only a matter of time…

“One of the best ways to thank essential workers is to support the fight to improve their lives.”

https://citizentruth.org/the-strike-wave-is-in-full-swing-amazon-whole-foods-workers-walk-off-job-to-protest-unjust-and-unsafe-labor-practices/

In case you missed it; this week’s spam Phisherman – PITY PARTY!!

How are you doing? I will like to be kind and honest with you, i am a woman that have seen life, i have been in the social circle for many years, although it does not matter one’s age, color or achievement.

What matters in life is your kindness to humanity.

I believe that is the most important thing in life, I had been hardworking all my life, i must think of something better, to enjoy my life and probably have a family maybe relocate and start investing in other things.

Anyway, i will like to tell you more about me, My name is Michelle, i am 38 years from France, i was born in France, And i left France at Age of 10 Years to United Kingdom, which to the glory of God Am working as a Senior Audit/banker in Citibank Inc United Kingdom, i have two children and they are schooling here in United Kingdom, I was married but my Ex-Husband was married to another woman without my knowledge, which caused our divorce, but is okay that is life for you, although is over between us, I am happy alone because I have everything i need, This is why I think of relocating to another country to get into investment and maybe own a small company which i can be able to manage on my own

Please, would you tell me more about yourself too? I like to know more about you, for me to know if we can achieve this goal together, your marital status and your country of origin.

[SURE. RIGHT AWAY. Fuck off! (I must say I do admire the sneaky quick introduction of the word INVEST… she works for a bank – you KNOW what’s next! Too funny.]

I will be glad to hear from you soon.

Yours Sincerely,

Michelle Arnaud, fisherwoman.

WAR is always about Land+Money

The Vietnam draft was WHITE People sending BLACK People to make war on the YELLOW People to defend land they stole from THE RED PEOPLE !

Ms. Piggy gets a New Phat Drug

In the vast wasteland that is the Internet, BIG Pharma has shat yet another advertisement for (yet another) miracle drug…

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Fucking the 2019 feminist agenda

How many of you know that November Nineteenth is International MENS day? Read the rest of this entry »

New Zealander Amazon Tax Alert!

Do not splurge during Boxing Day !

Consumer New Zealand is urging people to think carefully before going wild at Boxing Day sales. But no GST warning?

Chief executive Sue Chetwin said the balloons and bright lights of sales day were enticing, but shoppers should research products carefully before buying, to make sure they were the right things. Read the rest of this entry »

NEWZ! « This is NOT Amerika®

German Chancellor Angela Merkel and THE REST OF THE WORLD attempt to reason with the spoon-fed U.S. schoolboy. EMBARRASSING!

After 10 years at this, we’re bringing back an oldie but goodie. Starting in October 2018, we will crack open the audio vault and re-release highlights and Newlights of our award-winning series on fucked-up America.

We tried to stay away, but this trump fucker just keeps getting stupider and stupider! In short, there is just TOO MUCH FREE comedy GOLD to resist. This MORON keeps handing out beauties that just beg to be fondled…

STAY TUNED ! (Sorry, but this content will be restricted to our paid companion PodShow℠ subscribers only) Become a Member today!

Nintendo Wii Bowling Accident

We offer this to you as a PUBLIC SERVICE announcement… (TRY) not to laugh!

Step-by-Step Guide to Using a Chinese Public Bathroom

chinese-toilet1.jpg


Preparation
Make sure you have tissues, sanitizer, and especially your P-Mate out of your bags. Post up your bags on the hooks, and if there are none provided make sure you have your bags securely fastened (duct tape?) so they don’t fall or swing out while you are relieving yourself.
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It’s ALL Shit !

Religion and Shit

Taoism: Shit happens.

Hinduism: This shit happened before.

Buddhism: It is only the illusion of shit happening.

Zen: What is the sound of shit happening?

Islam: If shit happens, it is the will of Allah.

Jehovah’s Witness: Knock knock. Shit happens.

Atheism: There is no such thing as shit.

Agnosticism: Mabe shit happens – and maybe it doesn’t.

Protestantism: Shit won’t happen if I work harder.

Catholicism: If shit happens, I deserve it.

Judaism: Why does shit always happen to me?

Televangelism: Send money or shit will happen to you.

Rastafarianism: Smoke that shit.

Unitarianism: Who gives a shit!


A woman was unhappy with the way her laundry was done at the local Chinese laundry, so she wrote a note and put it in the bag with the next collection of soiled clothes: ‘USE MORE SOAP ON PANTIES!’

She got the clean laundry back, and was still dissatisfied with the results, so the following week she enclosed another note: ‘USE MORE SOAP ON PANTIES!’

The Chinese laundry man became very annoyed, and when her clean laundry was delivered, it contained a note from HIM: ‘I USE PLENTY SOAP ON PANTY!!! YOU USE MORE PAPER ON ASS!!’

———

**WARNING!**
DO NOT ZOOM !!!

 

ShaZam !!

(and if you think the above is gross, you ain’t seen below! – and we HIGHLY recommend you DON’T!)

rabble-the-rouser.gifDANGER!
Will Robinson,
DANGER!!

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